


for you, i'd give my all

by likeuwuahh



Category: TWICE (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, F/F, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-11
Updated: 2019-11-11
Packaged: 2021-01-27 16:28:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21395200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/likeuwuahh/pseuds/likeuwuahh
Summary: chaeyoung knew she was screwed the moment she saw the freesias spread across her skin
Relationships: Chou Tzuyu/Son Chaeyoung, Kim Dahyun/Son Chaeyoung
Comments: 14
Kudos: 93





	for you, i'd give my all

**Author's Note:**

  * For [forbiddenquill](https://archiveofourown.org/users/forbiddenquill/gifts).

> chaeyu is good angst material
> 
> -unedited

Chaeyoung knows she’s made a lot of poor decisions in her life. It’s something she’s come to embrace, choosing not to look back at the harm it caused to her or the people around her. Though, she comes to realise, it’ll shape one of the most important decisions of her life. Because, if she doesn’t make the right choice, Chaeyoung knows – she knows it’s something she can _never_ come back from.

Years ago, she met Chou Tzuyu.

Years ago, the flowers bloomed. She didn’t think of anything at that time, didn’t connect the dots that would lead up to her future. It was her first year of college and she’d met so many people. Of course, the possibilities of her soulmate were endless.

Now, Chaeyoung traces the tips of the white freesia inked on the underside of her forearm. It astounds her, how years ago, Chaeyoung was the happiest person in the world seeing the flowers bloom into her skin, the favourite flower of her soulmate spreading beautifully.

She remembers when she first found out that it was Tzuyu who was her soulmate. It had been an innocent conversation, but it had the power to change Chaeyoung’s life forever, shattering her mind and heart, sending them worlds away.

/

_“What’s your favourite flower?” Chaeyoung is doodling on her sketchbook as she leans on her bed. She looks over to her roommate who deeply considers her question. It takes her some time to answer and Chaeyoung finds it cute how much effort she’s putting into answering._

_“I would say, freesias.”_

_“Freesias?” Chaeyoung jolts from her spot. She tries to maintain her cool, playing her reaction off as nothing serious. She unconsciously holds onto her forearm._

_Of course, this is fate’s way of throwing her into a mess she doesn’t need to be in. In this cruel world, Tzuyu had to be her soulmate._

_“How about you?” Tzuyu asks, taking Chaeyoung off-guard._

_“Me? I don’t have a favourite flower.” Chaeyoung lies through her teeth. No, she’s not going to screw this friendship over this stupid soulmate business no matter what happens. “I can’t think of anything right now. Hydrangeas are pretty though.”_

/

She always covered her arms from then onwards, never wanting Tzuyu to catch sight of them. It was difficult to achieve with Tzuyu always asking her why she’s wearing long sleeved shirts in the summer. Chaeyoung resorted to wearing sweatbands around her forearm during that season only and all questions about it died out.

No matter how many times the topic of _soulmates_ came up, Chaeyoung diverged Tzuyu’s attention every single time.

She makes a vow to never tell Tzuyu about it, keeping her mouth shut each time Tzuyu whined about wanting to meet her soulmate. The guilt of keeping it away from her eats at Chaeyoung, yet she chooses to hold Tzuyu in her arms instead, embracing her until the ill feelings disappear from existence.

It brings them closer, even though every step scares Chaeyoung.

Years later, Chou Tzuyu is the biggest part of her life.

In between those years, from the blooming of the flowers etched onto her skin to now, Chaeyoung learns about _everything_ that’s got to do with her soulmate. Like, what she loves to do in her free time. Or what her favourite movie it is. Or that she has a dog named Gucci who she loves endlessly. Or that she likes to hide under her blankets when she’s sad, thinking it’ll protect her from the sadness. Chaeyoung even knows the fact that Tzuyu has a favourite hand-wash she uses, olive oil infused with rose water. She knows all of these things.

Yet, she had never once spotted Tzuyu’s soulmate mark.

It gives Chaeyoung hope – perhaps, Tzuyu _isn’t_ her soulmate. Surely, there will be more than one person in the world who likes freesias. It’s a common flower.

It’s the possibility of Tzuyu being her soulmate that _terrifies_ her. The fear engulfs her whole, swallowed into mines of silent thoughts. Tzuyu deserves so much better and Chaeyoung can never be the one to give her that.

The thought of keeping their precious friendship and letting it flourish makes Chaeyoung happy. She doesn’t want to lose another friend she’s become so close to. It’s a feeling she wants to revel in. To her, Tzuyu is the brightest star in the darkest of skies. A painting, a masterpiece that should be untouched. Thousands of compliments rest at the tip of Chaeyoung’s tongue, yet none do Tzuyu justice.

She basks in the bliss of being in the dark about Tzuyu’s soulmate.

Until she doesn’t.

It brings Chaeyoung to her knees when she spots the baby breaths against Tzuyu’s shoulder one evening. She’s helping a drunk Tzuyu change into her pyjamas when she sees it. She wishes she hadn’t. She hates how it looks so beautiful against her skin. She hates the way her heart flutters in her chest at the sight. Chaeyoung shovels the feelings of affection deep inside and pretends she never sees the flower the next morning.

Things shift.

Chaeyoung makes a decision.

She finds someone on campus. One, who shares the same sentiment as she does. Unlike Chaeyoung, she can’t hide her mark when it’s displayed against her neck for the world to see, even when she does her best to try.

Chaeyoung wasn’t looking for her. The wind had picked up and blown her hair back, giving her a view of the girl’s tattoo. There’s uneven foundation spread across the skin but Chaeyoung can still see through, making out the flower.

The hydrangeas attract Chaeyoung’s eyes from the first time she lays her eyes on them.

/

_“Your mark is beautiful.” Chaeyoung almost scares the girl as she sits beside her. “But, it feels like you try to cover it?”_

_She doesn’t receive a response in return. The girl watches Chaeyoung with curious eyes and Chaeyoung doesn’t really blame her. Her conversation hadn’t really been an ideal one to start up with a stranger._

_Her eyes drop down to the sweatband around Chaeyoung’s forearm. She immediately relaxes, a look of understanding crosses her face._

_“Kim Dahyun. Hiding this from my best friend, who’s currently dating her best friend.” She offers her hand._

_“Son Chaeyoung. Hiding this from my roommate, and a really good friend.” Chaeyoung slips her hand through Dahyun’s._

/

A month later, Chaeyoung introduces Dahyun to Tzuyu as her girlfriend. She holds onto Dahyun’s hand throughout the time they’re there. Chaeyoung feels her heart is slightly at ease when Tzuyu smiles brightly at her.

Tzuyu points to the hydrangeas against Dahyun’s neck, eyes sparkling when she recalls Chaeyoung talking about her favourite flower.

Chaeyoung grinds her teeth. The lie she’d spurted out in the moment of fear is something Tzuyu still remembers. There’s an ache beneath her ribcage, radiating throughout her body. If her heart feels like this, she doesn’t know if her choice is worth it.

(it’s breaking apart, slowly, slowly)

She cries in Dahyun’s arms later that night. Why is it that even though Chaeyoung feels like she made the right decision, it’s killing her on the inside like this?

“If you don’t tell her, you’ll lose her. I couldn’t do anything about my soulmate, but you can. Are you really prepared to lose her to someone else?”

Dahyun’s words echo in her ears for days.

Chaeyoung tries to muster up the courage but it leads her nowhere.

/

A few months down the track.

She loses Tzuyu.

**Author's Note:**

> @likeuwuahh on twitter


End file.
